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How To Live According To Your Values

by | Mar 18, 2024

Matt and Robyn Roberts are co-owners of Jacksonville-based Riverside Homes, parents to three beautiful children, generous supporters of Rethreaded, and they have been married for 23 years. They are living what is, for many of us, a dream. But they didn’t get there by accident.

In Rethreading Lives episode 5, we had an insightful conversation with them about how to live your life according to values that drive your choices and maximize your potential. They are an inspiration to our team, and we hope their story will be an encouragement to you.

Robyn: An example of intentional living.

Robyn, like the rest of us, knows she has limited time and energy. In response, she has chosen to be very intentional (13:00) with her time, money, relationships, and community. In her words, “I knew I had to focus on what was really important to me and not be pulled in 1,000 different directions.” (13:28)

She has made choices about what is truly important and then focused on those things. In practice, this looks like prioritizing people and not activities. Within their family, she has set aside intentional time to spend with her husband and children so she can give them her best and not her “leftovers.”

Because Robyn is a natural planner and list maker, she has developed habits to organize her life and schedule in a way that places people–particularly the ones who matter most to her–at the forefront, valuing and fostering important relationships before anything else.

Matt: An example of hard work and accountability.

Matt’s primary values (19:00) are hard work, humility, and extreme self-ownership, by which he means “looking at yourself first” and avoiding the temptation to blame other people or our circumstances for our actions.

Importantly, he does not mean he believes he has built his life himself (27:00). The reason Matt works hard is because he has a purpose, or a reason for being here (20:09). And, for him, self-ownership is a lot like Rethreaded’s core ingredient, openness, which means he focuses on being accountable not only to himself, but also to others.

Far from the “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” ethic that isolates us and adds unhealthy pressure, Matt lives and works within a community. (45:00) Not a natural extrovert, this doesn’t mean he spends a lot of personal time with friends. Instead, in his life, he has open and meaningful relationships with his family and the people he works with. Within that context, he is motivated to do his best with and for the people in his sphere of influence.

Applying The Roberts Family Goal Circle

Every year, both within their family and at Riverside Homes, Matt and Robyn make a goal circle or, as their kids call it, “The Wheel.” (49:45) This exercise asks everyone to set concrete goals, for which they are accountable to one another, in the following areas: spiritual, physical, social, financial, and educational.

By focusing on clear objectives, like paying off their house or learning a new and specific skill, they grow their “spheres” of potential. Their vision of what’s possible shifts, growing their faith and expectations, and their choices naturally align around their objectives.

Here is what the Goal Circle looks like. We encourage you to sit down with your family, friends, or colleagues to discuss where you’re going and what you want to achieve, both as a group and individually. The fruit of this exercise is obvious in the Roberts family, and we hope it will be beneficial to you as well. To learn more about the Goal Circle and intentional living, listen to episode 5 of Rethreading Lives.

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